When a Doctor Faces Her Father’s Death at Home

A personal account published in the New England Journal of Medicine (NEJM) describes how an intensive care unit (ICU) doctor — trained to manage death in clinical settings — found that arranging for her father to die at home carried far greater burdens for her family than she had anticipated. The piece, written by Dr Danielle D. DeCourcey, is published under the journal’s Perspective series.

Dr DeCourcey went into the experience expecting comfort, dignity, and control, with hospice support and family close by. But the reality, she writes, revealed what home death actually requires of the people left to manage it — a question that even her medical background had not fully prepared her for.

The essay is notable precisely because it comes from inside medicine. ICU physicians routinely guide other families through end-of-life decisions. Dr DeCourcey’s account turns that professional lens on her own experience — and finds the gap between clinical knowledge and lived reality wider than expected.

Home hospice care allows people to die outside hospital, supported by a care team that visits rather than admits. Families typically take on a significant caregiving role in between those visits. The NEJM piece suggests that role can be underestimated, even by those who know the healthcare system well.

The full essay, “For Those Left Behind,” is available through the NEJM website.

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Anyone supporting a family member through end-of-life care can contact their GP or NHS 111 for guidance on local hospice and palliative care services. The Samaritans helpline is available around the clock on 116 123 for anyone finding the emotional weight of a caring role difficult to carry.